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Monday, July 24, 2006

The Pelican Grief

From Reuters:
LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - Four pelicans suspected of being drunk on sea algae were being tested at a Southern California wildlife center Saturday after one of them crashed headlong into a car.

Three of the California brown pelicans were found wandering dazed in the streets of Laguna Beach after another pelican struck a vehicle's windshield on a nearby coast road.

It suffered internal injuries and a long gash in its pouch and was undergoing toxicology tests.

Officials at the Wildlife Care Center said the seabirds may have been under the influence of algae in the ocean that can produce domoic acid poisoning when eaten.

The other pelicans were rounded up after assistant wildlife director Lisa Birkle warned the public to be on the lookout for birds acting "drunk," disoriented or being in an unusual place.
So now acting drunk, disoriented or being in an unusual place is a crime? There was a time we called that "college." I went to college in Manhattan, and one time my friend Mike and I decided it was a great idea to walk back from a bar down the middle of Broadway, into incoming traffic. There was a cop car sitting a couple of blocks up and the friendly officers turned on their loudspeaker and said "Okay rocket scientists get out of the road." They invited us over to the car and Mike informed them that we were very drunk. This didn't suprise them - I guess they were detectives or something. We promised them we'd behave and they let us go and later that night we stole the front door off the fraternity house next door. But now if Lisa Birkle gets her way, this kind of good clean fun will be a thing of the past. And the terrorists will have won.

By the way, let me save you some time. Ebay doesn't have any more sea algae.

Blogger Diecast Dude said...

Of course eBay is fresh out of sea algae.  The moment this story hit the wires, sixteen year olds around the country decided this would be a much better way to go than trying to shoplift yet another bottle of JD from the local drugstore.  "Healthy herb" defense and all.

19:45  
Anonymous fmragtops said...

Diecast Dude: Hey, that's natural selection.

Drunk pelicans?! I think that's one of the signs of the apocalypse.

22:44  
Anonymous sam said...

The funniest thing about this story is when the 'refuge' decided to free the 'hammered' pelicans, the one pelican who crashed into the car window...again slammed into the rocks and stumbled into the water hahahaha crazy pelicans!

12:59  
Anonymous nino said...

I thought you were supposed to smoke the algae. I guess i've been doing it wrong.

"a long gash in its pouch"
I hate it when that happens.

14:57  
Anonymous Pierre DuPont Copeland IV said...

And what which fraternity house was that? I wasn't aware there was one next door but then again, I've been away for a while.

23:32  
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01:39  
Anonymous Pelican Cases said...

I must say that I myself am very much the animal lover! When I was younger, I used to live on a farm. Now, it wasn't your traditional farm with cows and all rather a farm with peacocks, doves, parrots, bunnies, puppies, chickens, ducks, and a dog named Bonnie that made sure every thing was okay! :) Basically a farm that consisted of only the cutest animals on the planet! I loved them all, they were part of the family and even up until today I speak about them because they are, what can I say, a real part of my history :)

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