Want to become a star blogger at the Huffington Post? Take the following test and see if you qualify! Give yourself one point for every “yes” answer, unless otherwise noted.
- Are you an underworked or out-of-work actor?
- Are you the spouse of an actor?
- Are you both?
- Have you ever started your own religion?
- Will hiring you increase Arianna’s chances of going to all the right parties?
- Is making up words such as “Repugs” or “Retardicans” the highlight of your day?
- Do you secretly want
Americato fail in because it will make President Bush look bad? Iraq
- Do you secretly not support our troops because deep down you’re sure they’re just a bunch of illiterate thugs who mindlessly follow orders and enjoy torturing innocent civilians?
- Do you believe that some Christians are overly sensitive, and that these people should be ridiculed mercilessly?
- Do you believe that some Muslims are overly sensitive, and that these people should be treated with the utmost deference and respect?
- Does it still boggle your mind that
elected an actor as its President? America
- Do you wish Alec Baldwin would run for President?
- Do you think Americans who disagree with you are evil, but foreigners who want to kill you are misunderstood?
- Do you think your political views are generally mainstream but that average Americans are generally idiots?
- Do you think you’re open minded, but believe that people who don’t always agree with you are morons?
- Do you think CBS News is too conservative?
- Do you think people who believe Bush are morons?
- Do you believe Michael Moore?
- Do you believe Cindy Sheehan has “absolute moral authority,” but that mothers who have lost sons in
and are pro-war do not? Iraq
- Do you think people such as Ann Coulter and Bill O’Reilly are poisonous to our political culture?
- Do you think Daily Kos and Al Franken are a breath of fresh air?
- Did you find “Crash” to be a challenging yet realistic look at everyday life in
? Los Angeles
- Did you watch “Crash” in your own screening room while private security patrolled your neighborhood?
- Do you think George Clooney is brave? Does the name Theo van Gogh mean anything to you? (Subtract one point if it does.)
- Do you understand that a good sign that you don’t live in a fascist society is that you can rage against living in a fascist society and not get shot? (Subtract one point if you do.)
How to rate your score:
5-10: You might be better off checking for an opening at The New Republic.
11-15: You have potential. Say three Hail Cindys, watch Fahrenheit: 9/11 again, then re-take the test.
16-20: Almost there. Work on your credentials by posting nasty comments at Gutfeld’s blog.
17 or more: Congratulations, you’re gold! The only reason you don’t have your own HufflePuff blog yet is that you haven’t sent enough money to Deepak.
(Note: This test was adapted from a comment I once left on Greg Gutfeld’s Huffington Post blog.)