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Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Movie Review: Chasing Zarqawi

The usually so-camera-shy-it's-adorable al-Qaeda in Iraq leader Abu Musab al-Zarqawi appeared in a rare video that was posted on a Web site "that al-Zarqawi’s group often uses to post Internet messages," according to

Zarqawi shouldn't be so shy: he's wearing a totally chic black scarf (Hugo Boss, if I'm not mistaken) around his head, and he's got a simply fabulous beard and moustache combo that gives him a "sexy in an early John Turturro kind of way" look. Cranky says Allah gave you your sexy for a reason, so work it, girlfriend!

The actualy content of the video is the usual blather about crusaders and jihad and mujihadeen. C'mon, Zarqy: that's sooooooo 2003! Somebody's coasting like he wants to be in Ocean's 13! Cranky knows where you're coming from, Z, but Cranky gots to know what's next for his favorite Abu-Fabu holy warrior!

Presentation: A-
Content: D

Chasing Zarqawi is rated R for homoerotic suggestiveness.

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